Walter Matthau's Hilarious Toilet Joke | December 10th, 1981

my wife said don't tell any uh toilet jokes on the on the she you still remember the Earth don't tell any toilet jokes on the Johnny cson show and the guy came out one of the cops came over and he just told me a toilet joke don't do it I'm going to try and tell it see if I clean it up a little all right three old guys sitting around convalescent home one guy says if I could just do number one I mean if I could do like a strong number one like you know not in dribs and drabs the second guy says if I could do a good number [Music] two I mean a solid one you know squeeze and I comes out you know it's terrible third guy says I wonderful number one like torrential rains and Pango Pango like the Mississippi Rivers he says that's at 7:30 every morning and 7:35 in the morning I have a wonderful number two he says like Mount St Helen's he says erupting that's that's at 7:35 in the morning so the other guy says he says so what are you complaining about he says well I don't get out of bed till 9: [Applause]